After you found out your husband had an emotional affair, you may feel neglected, angry or sad. Sometimes it is hard to determine whether the affair also involves a physical one.
Ask yourself if the relationship your husband has with the other person is concealed or transparent, and if he feels special to that person but does not feel the same when with you, then the relationship is of an emotional kind. An emotional relationship is usually concealed as the spouse knows it is wrong.
Broken intimacy in marriages can be fixed. Your husband has to first admit he is having an emotional affair. This will act as a forward step into rebuilding your marriage and intimacy. There are some steps that you can follow to repair your relationship and broken intimacy.
First, evaluate your intimacy. Your husband may have some excuses as to why he has an emotional or physical relationship. Excuses for emotional or sexual affairs should not come up at all. You may want to understand why your husband is having an emotional or sexual relationship, or both.
Affairs usually start with dissatisfaction in the marriage. Cheaters nurse feelings arising from dissatisfaction as time goes by and sometimes bring up arguments based on their dissatisfaction and apparent resentment to give them more leverage for cheating.
You need to ask yourself if there are signs of dissatisfaction or neglect and whether the two of you communicate in a healthy way. Be honest with yourself when making this evaluation, as it will help you find out the areas in your marriage that need fixing and where communication is needed.
The second step requires you to know the different kinds of communication. Communication can either be verbal or non-verbal. Although talking is important, there is more to communication than just talking. These two kinds of communication play a major role in deepening your intimacy. Catching a movie, flirting, spending time together and giving love cards are all ways of communicating non-verbally.
Normally, a husband who had an emotional affair goes outside marriage to find someone to communicate to, someone that can make him feel special. Reinforce the bond of communication, verbal as well as non-verbal, between you and your spouse in order to salvage your marriage. You can start by re-initiating intimate activities that both of you used to indulge in.
Talk about books, trips you would fancy taking, how you both spent your days, a story told by a neighbor or friend and you may also talk about your relationship, future aspirations and plans. This will help in making your verbal way of communicating better. Persistence is needed particularly if your communication had completely eroded since it takes long before intimacy is re-connected.